I parked around the corner and he was sitting outside. Which was kind of weird. It wasn't even nice out. Normally if you get there first you get a coffee and sit inside with your laptop in case you get stood up, so you just look like you need free wifi. But I digress. We said hello... and he just stood there silent. I suggested going inside, for a coffee, and he mumbled ok. This is when I noticed that he was a little slow? He managed to open the door, at least.. and I noticed that he even walked really slow. I had pretty much ordered and paid by the time he got to the counter. Didn't offer to pay, not even a fake out pay.... you know how some guys are cheap and offer to pay but you know they don't want to? It was only $3 so not a big deal. After we got our coffee, he just stood there silent and awkward again. For almost 30 seconds, at least... so I suggested we sit down. Three hours later he made it to a table and we proceeded to have the most awkward conversation I have ever had. It wasn't just awkward... it was PAINFUL.
Things running through my mind:
He's really slow.
He's really awkward.
Who wears suede jackets after 1995?
The faster I drink this coffee the faster I can get out of here.
Why can't I drink faster?
Why is this guy not talking?
So, I felt like I had to take one for the team and try to keep a lively conversation going... until... he started talking about cold sores. That's not exactly an attractive topic to talk about on a blind date, because I don't really want your herpes. So, I'm probably not going to kiss you. Or anything else, mind you because I'd like to be herpes free. During this 20 min run-on-sentence about cold sores, all I could think about was a big red pulsating cold sore. Like a traffic light. When there was a break, I mentioned that since I have strep throat I'd like to get to bed early (it was 8pm) and take a rain check on a movie. There was no way I was babysitting this guy through a movie. I wondered if he drove as slow as he walked and talked? Didn't want to chance it, so I said nice to meet you, (which was a lie) and took off.
The thing is, he's not handicapable at all, he was just a slow person.